goodbye october.

It's been a month of decisions, and obstacles. However good things also came along.

The weather was beautiful, and I've had a lot of adjusting to do.

The end of the month means the beginning of a new journey for me, as I've said in my other blog posts.

The colors of the trees are changing and I hope that I will be changing for the better too. I really love this season it is beautiful looking at the leaves change.

but through all that change some flower bushes still held strong and have gorgeous flowers (although I could do without the bees). 

What do you guys expect or are hoping for this November?

Con amor,

Yaris ♡

my journey to independence. part 1

Ok, so I said I wanted to take you guys on a journey with me and I'll start from the beginning.

Last semester I had a relapse in my condition and my health and course work suffered greatly from it. I ended up taking a medical withdrawal from the semester and started treatment. I've known for some years now that I had lost my independence because of my disability, but I never reached out for help. In my mind, it was my problem and I needed to deal with it myself. At this point I didn't even know that I had a disability... So for the most part there was a lot of denial in my part even though I had clear relapses every year. Until all of it got pent up and kind of exploded last semester.... Since I have been in treatment, but I also felt/realized that I'm dependent. I need to be with a guardian (family or friend) most of the time. I knew I didn't want to live this way my whole life. I want to be able to live for myself, so I started researching and found out that one of my best options would be getting a service dog. I researched every single organization out there that would have the type of dog I need and I found Little Angels Service Dogs.

I took my first step into my journey to independence 

Con amor,

Yaris ♡

From where I stand

From where I stand on my road to recovery. Taking everything one day at a time. Slowly,  but surely. Recovery is a long and tedious road, but thankfully I'm not alone.

#vscocam

Con amor,

Yaris ♡

I want to take you on a journey with me.

I'm not good at sharing personal aspects of my life, but I forgot the reason that I started this blog was to help me cope.

So in an attempt to open up more (a sad attempt at that) I'm going to invite you guys to come with me (keep me company) on a journey.

I'm in the process of getting a service dog and thought it would be a good idea to record the process here since it's such a stressful process. I'm not at the stage where I'm comfortable with my disability, in fact it's a source of embarrassment for me. I'm very disappointed in myself, but this isn't what this blog post is about. That is a story for another day.

All I want to ask for now is if you guys would like to join me in this journey?It is a new stage in my life that I'd like to share. At the same time maybe learn about each other too........

Con amor,

Yaris ♡

slowly, but surely.

Slowly,  but surely I'm getting better.

It's an uphill battle, so I'm taking it one step at a time

Hopefully I'll get better

Con amor,

Yaris ♡

Today is my first time leaving my dorm for about a week and a half.....

I have some serious things to think about my future and my health

i'm a shitty person....

Every time I open my mouth I mess things up.....

I'm a horrible friend
I don't deserve my friends
They deserve better





I'm a pathetic person... why am i even allowed to live?